Annelise Corinne
Born on October 22, 2014
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Showing posts with label Kids. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Kids. Show all posts
Finding Joy In The Chaos
Let's get real. Being a mom is hard.
It's screaming fits in public. It's teething for a year straight.
It's catapulting pancake pieces across the kitchen. {Oh, your kids don't do that?}
It's catapulting pancake pieces across the kitchen. {Oh, your kids don't do that?}
It's everything I never imagined it would be. and... luckily, it's
EVERYTHING I NEVER IMAGINED IT WOULD BE.
Recently I was reminded of a quote about the "4 things you can never get back"
The STONE after it's thrown.
The WORD after it's said.
The OCCASION after it's missed.
and the TIME after it's gone.
I struggle with joyful times as a parent. What I mean is, I almost always
ruin that amazing, breathtakingly beautiful moment with my child when he
reaches a milestone or does something hilarious, or when he just runs up and
wraps his arms around my neck.
ruin that amazing, breathtakingly beautiful moment with my child when he
reaches a milestone or does something hilarious, or when he just runs up and
wraps his arms around my neck.
I enjoy it, I do.... for a moment. And then the realization sets in deeper that before
I know it, he won't want to blow me these kisses anymore. He won't be small
enough for me to scoop up and tickle, and some day, I will no longer be the most
important woman in his life anymore. It's just reality. So instead of getting to
stretch out these joyful times with laughter and big smiles on our faces, I turn
into a pile of goo with tears streaming down my face and before I even know
it, I'm gripping on to my kid like a leach repeating please don't grow up,
please don't grow up over and over again.
I know it, he won't want to blow me these kisses anymore. He won't be small
enough for me to scoop up and tickle, and some day, I will no longer be the most
important woman in his life anymore. It's just reality. So instead of getting to
stretch out these joyful times with laughter and big smiles on our faces, I turn
into a pile of goo with tears streaming down my face and before I even know
it, I'm gripping on to my kid like a leach repeating please don't grow up,
please don't grow up over and over again.
Ugh. It's a pathetic sight. Believe me.
But moms, the thing we need to realize is, they ARE going to grow up.
There's nothing we can do about THAT.
There's nothing we can do about THAT.
What we CAN do something about, is finding so much joy in the everyday
chaos so that we get the very most out of the time we are given with
these precious little gifts.
chaos so that we get the very most out of the time we are given with
these precious little gifts.
If you would have asked me as a newlywed how I would feel about pancake
pieces with syrup on my kitchen floor, I would have shuttered at the
thought. Ha! Not in my immaculately kept home. {or so it was in some
parallel universe called my imagination} But I've found that as a mom, you just
can't worry about those things. If you do, before you know it, you are running
to grab a wet cloth all while scolding your child and drowning out the sound
of his laughter and missing the big beautiful smile on his face. Do I mean
not to teach him table manners? Well, of course not. If your child catapults
food at every sitting, I'd say it's probably lesson time. But if this is a one time
thing and you can find it within yourself to play along for just a minute, I urge
you to find the joy in it.
pieces with syrup on my kitchen floor, I would have shuttered at the
thought. Ha! Not in my immaculately kept home. {or so it was in some
parallel universe called my imagination} But I've found that as a mom, you just
can't worry about those things. If you do, before you know it, you are running
to grab a wet cloth all while scolding your child and drowning out the sound
of his laughter and missing the big beautiful smile on his face. Do I mean
not to teach him table manners? Well, of course not. If your child catapults
food at every sitting, I'd say it's probably lesson time. But if this is a one time
thing and you can find it within yourself to play along for just a minute, I urge
you to find the joy in it.
I use this as an example because it happened this morning. As I was teaching my
son how to hold the spoon and put the pancake in his mouth, he grabbed a
hold of the end of the spoon, pulled it down with all his might and let go -
causing the pancake to rocket across the room. My eyes got big and my
mouth opened wide and he started laughing the sweetest laugh I've ever
heard in my life. My first reaction was to say "No, Connor!" in my annoyed
tone and get up to grab the flying shrapnel off of the side of the cabinet.
But I remembered part of the quote I had heard days before - the things
you can't get back ... and that moment, was something that I could
never be given again.
son how to hold the spoon and put the pancake in his mouth, he grabbed a
hold of the end of the spoon, pulled it down with all his might and let go -
causing the pancake to rocket across the room. My eyes got big and my
mouth opened wide and he started laughing the sweetest laugh I've ever
heard in my life. My first reaction was to say "No, Connor!" in my annoyed
tone and get up to grab the flying shrapnel off of the side of the cabinet.
But I remembered part of the quote I had heard days before - the things
you can't get back ... and that moment, was something that I could
never be given again.
-So I embraced it.-
I laughed and laughed with him. I took another piece of pancake and shot it
over his head. He died laughing. He kicked his legs in his little highchair
and snorted. Sure, I might have a mess to clean up later. I might have to
make one more pancake so that he has enough to eat. And no, he will
never remember that fun morning with Momma when we
shot pancakes across the kitchen, ...
over his head. He died laughing. He kicked his legs in his little highchair
and snorted. Sure, I might have a mess to clean up later. I might have to
make one more pancake so that he has enough to eat. And no, he will
never remember that fun morning with Momma when we
shot pancakes across the kitchen, ...
BUT I WILL.
Yesterday we had to run some errands at the mall for a wedding I am
in this weekend. I was a little nervous about how the day would go because
I knew it would take me some time to find all of the things I needed,
and though my son is probably the friendliest kid I've ever seen - saying
'Hi' and waving to everyone we pass and even blowing kisses to complete
strangers - he is still only one, and he still gets tired and irritable.
in this weekend. I was a little nervous about how the day would go because
I knew it would take me some time to find all of the things I needed,
and though my son is probably the friendliest kid I've ever seen - saying
'Hi' and waving to everyone we pass and even blowing kisses to complete
strangers - he is still only one, and he still gets tired and irritable.
We just made the most of it. I tried to find joy in the chaos all day, despite
how tiring and stressful and hectic it all was. Though I needed to pick up
most of these things for adults, I vowed not to make the day just about
me while I had "a child inconveniently tagging along". We played in the
fire trucks and cars. We met the Easter Bunny. We took photos in the
photo booth. We ate lunch together and shared a fruit cup.
how tiring and stressful and hectic it all was. Though I needed to pick up
most of these things for adults, I vowed not to make the day just about
me while I had "a child inconveniently tagging along". We played in the
fire trucks and cars. We met the Easter Bunny. We took photos in the
photo booth. We ate lunch together and shared a fruit cup.
I could have just run in on a mission, got what I needed, shushed my
child with every person we passed and headed back home. It probably
would have been easier. But instead, we made memories.
child with every person we passed and headed back home. It probably
would have been easier. But instead, we made memories.
It wasn't anything special. It hardly took any effort. But it was one of the
best days of my life. I know that's going to sound odd to some. Especially
those whose lives are so exciting and adventurous and magical and don't
include snotty noses and green beans spit into your hand.
best days of my life. I know that's going to sound odd to some. Especially
those whose lives are so exciting and adventurous and magical and don't
include snotty noses and green beans spit into your hand.
So my advice to every mother-to-be or momma whose baby is still little
and has yet to learn to walk and talk and get into literally
everything they see ....
and has yet to learn to walk and talk and get into literally
everything they see ....
Is to take a deep breath. To find joy in every moment.
It's going to be a lot of work. You're going to have to do more physical
labor than you want. You're probably going to break a sweat more
than you hoped. You'll have to repeat the same silly things or
annoying songs over and over again just for a half of a smile.
It means taking a detour on your shopping trips to let your kids
just be kids. It means cleaning your kitchen (and your entire
house for that matter) more than you expected. And moms,
we're going to HAVE to get off of the internet and our cell
phones. We're going to have to get off of Pinterest, and
Facebook, and Twitter, and Instagram, and our email, and our text
messages and all of the other things that distract us during the day
when our kids aren't napping and we should
be playing with and teaching them.
labor than you want. You're probably going to break a sweat more
than you hoped. You'll have to repeat the same silly things or
annoying songs over and over again just for a half of a smile.
It means taking a detour on your shopping trips to let your kids
just be kids. It means cleaning your kitchen (and your entire
house for that matter) more than you expected. And moms,
we're going to HAVE to get off of the internet and our cell
phones. We're going to have to get off of Pinterest, and
Facebook, and Twitter, and Instagram, and our email, and our text
messages and all of the other things that distract us during the day
when our kids aren't napping and we should
be playing with and teaching them.
We aren't guaranteed another child. I think about that every day.
And we surely aren't guaranteed another day with our little one.
This is the only one we're certain of. So I suggest we make the most of it.
We embrace the mess. We find joy in the chaos.
And we surely aren't guaranteed another day with our little one.
This is the only one we're certain of. So I suggest we make the most of it.
We embrace the mess. We find joy in the chaos.
We send our children into their futures, knowing they are valued and loved.
...and if that means I have to clean up a few pancakes ... bring it on.
Children are the living messages we send
to a time we will not see. ~Neil Postman
to a time we will not see. ~Neil Postman
Super C's First Birthday Party
This past weekend we threw a superhero birthday party for our son who will turn one tomorrow. I can't believe how fast time flies. Here are some pictures from the party. It was a blast!
We love you, Super C!
5 Lessons I will Teach my Daughter (that I had to learn the hard way).
So often we think we have everything figured out. What would be best for our lives, who would be best in our lives, and how the future should play out. But trying to control what happens in your future is like trying to change a book that has already been published. I'm willing to bet that there will be times in my daughters' lives [plural, did you catch that?] when I will have to console their broken hearts. When they don't understand why they didn't make the grade, they didn't get the job, or the boy didn't stay. And all I will be able to tell them will be from my own experiences, that God knows what He's doing. That bigger and better things will be waiting around the corner if they stay faithful and live for Him. But something tells me that they won't listen, just like I didn't, and they will have to finally see this for themselves.
2. Never confuse Kindness with Weakness.
You will find that strength and power so often have to equal harshness and rudeness. Not always, but a lot of the time. It doesn't make any sense, really. You never win true friends this way. Being the bully in school never pays off. And being the bully as an adult never does either. The only person you will be fooling is yourself. Kindness to others , ... understanding, patience, forgiveness,.... those are true strengths. So never let anyone make you feel inferior because you are a kindhearted person. It takes a lot more courage to be tenderhearted and gentle with others than it does to run all over them.
3. People are often shallow when it comes to appearances.
That is their sickness. Not yours.
Don't ever try to mold into what people think you should be. There will always be people in the world that are going to make comments about those who are over weight, about those who have different facial features, etc. The tricky part is, society will try to make you feel like you have something that needs to be fixed, when in reality, those who are critical are the ones with the problem. They tend to be the shallow and insecure ones that can't seem to get passed what lies on the outside. Pray for them. Realize that you are beautiful just the way that God made you. Don't fall for their lies and definitely don't become a part of their sickness. There is nothing more unattractive than a woman who has to put others down because of their looks in order to feel better about hers.
4. Forgive. Forgive. Forgive.
When someone hurts you, have compassion. I'm not insisting that you bury your feelings and never let anyone know how they made you feel, but do so with mercy and forgiveness. Put your self in the other person's shoes. Try and figure out why they might have done these things to hurt you. Try to understand them. And when you realize they they were unkind because of the sadness and disappointment in their own life, again, say a prayer for them and be the bigger person. Forgiveness is better for you than it is for the person you are forgiving. And remember, if you want to be an example of Christ, there is no better way to do that than with mercy and love.
5. Be ready for the moment.
There will be one crucial moment in your life. One moment that will never replay. And in that moment, something will happen that will make your heart stop. You will just hold your breath. For a split second, you will be reminded of what is important in life. And that nothing else is. This moment can come in so many different forms. It can come in the form of a letter saying goodbye, in the doctor telling you that your husband has cancer, in the birth of a child, in the death of a loved one. I'm not sure how this moment is going to appear to you, but my sweet daughter, be ready. Because this moment changes your life.
Monkey See Monkey Do...
Recently I have been debating on whether or not I wanted to blog about an experience that Adam and I had a few weeks ago. It was definitely one of those things that got my blood boiling enough to come home and write right away, but also something so intimate and fragile when it comes to parents and their children, that I did not want to blog about it without giving it a lot of thought and prayer. After seeing that one of my heroes - Jean Kilbourne - has a new book out, I decided that this would be the perfect opportunity to go ahead and blog about the atrocities of the other night and .. hey, maybe plug her new book for all of you parents out there.
It was a Saturday night and we decided that since we had not had a date night in a little while, we would go out somewhere. After a lot of thought about where we wanted to go, we decided on a skating rink. We had not been skating in years and we both thought that it would be great exercise for us and fun at the same time. Boy were we wrong! Let's just say, I CAN NOT have fun when I'm watching children throwing their lives away. From the moment we got in there and sat down to put our skates on, I already had a knot in my stomach because of the lyrics that I heard in the music. They were not only completely degrading to women, but most of them were encouraging teens to have sex. Some other lyrics that I thought were incredibly disturbing where the ones that said - "I'm gonna (gun shots) take your money". I looked out on the skating rink and saw 7-9 yr old girls singing this song. But it didn't end there.
I found out a lot that night. I found out that kids don't go to the skating rink to skate anymore. Now in some rinks, they have a platform in the middle of the floor for the kids who want to take their skates off and dance. Now we aren't talking the chicken dance. I mean, these little girls are dancing the moves that they are seeing on these rap videos. Not only are the little boys in there watching them, but the older boys, and some of the dads (creepy I know) that are there with their kids. At this point I had almost lost my dinner, I was so sick to my stomach. I carefully looked at the outfits of some of the little girls in there. One little girl had her shirt unbuttoned to her belly button so that you could see her bra. Another pack of girls came in with booty shorts on and socks almost up to their thighs and their shirts tied up over their stomachs, as if to portray a french maid outfit or something. I was appalled. To watch them dance around - girl on girl on that stage for the crowd to see was one thing, but to know that they could not be more than 13 yrs old, any of them, was what really made me angry inside. This is what we are doing to our next generation. We are teaching them to be objects and boys that go looking for objects. We are teaching them to shoot people to "take their money".
I am not the kind of person that HAS or WILL EVER become desensitized to this kind of thing. If you know me fairly well you know that this is one of my passions in life, to see that this type of entertainment gets erased. To see that our next generations are taught virtues and morals and what it means to really be valuable. But this night just broke my heart. After we had been there for only a short while, we just had to go. Part of me was so done with everything that I had witnessed in there, I just wanted to run outside and never look back at that filth. But the other part of me was crying inside for every child in there whose parents thought they were just "going skating". And for every child in there whose parents knew they weren't going skating and didn't care. Most of all, my heart broke for my future daughters. Adam and I are not trying to have a family yet, but it isn't something that we haven't talked about. And every time we talk about having children I get this feeling in my heart that brings such joy. At the same time, I get another feeling in my stomach that brings fear of what they will have to endure in this vulgar and evil world. It reminds me of lyrics from a song I love by Plumb- called "In My Arms".. it says
"Story books are full of fairytales
Of kings and queens and the bluest skies
My heart is torn, just in knowing
You'll someday see the truth from lies...."
Of kings and queens and the bluest skies
My heart is torn, just in knowing
You'll someday see the truth from lies...."
Please, whatever you do, those of you who are parents out there... be more involved in the influences that your child is around. Be more cautious about what they are listening to and watching, and where they are going. Make sure it is age appropriate. Don't make your child grow up faster than they should just because it is the new trend. I see so many little girls now days, and by little I mean 5 and 6, wearing Hanna Montana shirts and talking about HIGH SCHOOL musical.
So if you are saying to yourself, yeah, these things are getting bad, but I'm not sure how to protect my kids from it all .. Have no Fear! There are lots of materials out there to help you. Try going here - and pick up this book or seeing what this awesome lady has to say at her website. Also, this, this, and this, article might be helpful in a lot of ways. So remember the next time that you go to drop your kids off at the skating rink, the mall, or at some movie that you know nothing about, all of the avenues that our society is taking to corrupt the minds of our children. Teach them about morals and purity. About what is classy and what is trashy. Teach your sons to respect women and to desire one that is virtuous and not scandalous. Teach your daughters that there is more to being valuable than how "hot" everyone thinks she is. Please, if not for your children, ....then for mine.