Welcome To The World

Annelise Corinne 

Born on October 22, 2014

Nursery Reveal: Annelise's Mint, Coral & Gold Nursery

I am just thrilled with the way our daughter's nursery turned out. We didn't really have a theme, but I decided to go with the colors Mint, Coral, and Gold and to add lots of modern aspects - like artwork, calligraphy, tissue paper garland, and yes - of course, that deer head. Don't ya just love it? ;-)

You Are So Loved Wall Decal // Papermade

Tissue Paper Garland // Glam Fete by Bri

Mint Pillow with Arrows // Chuck Two Forty Eight

Oh Baby Banner // Little Dovie

White Shag Rug // Pier One

Coral Triangle Pillow & Watercolor Giraffe Pillow // Society6

Gold Dot Blanket & Burp Cloth // Sugarplum Lane

Bookshelves & Crib // IKEA

Deer head & Lamp // Hobby Lobby

Coral Changing Pad Cover // The Buttercup Boutique

Colorful Art Print above dresser // Land of Nod

Calligraphy Prints - Thou Fount, Beautiful Girl, World is Lucky, Eat you Up // Lindsay Letters

 Giraffe Print // The Animal Print Shop

Dresser // Ashley Furniture

Bump Update: 32 Weeks

How far along:  32 weeks

Gender:  A girl
Baby Weight: 3.7 lbs

Precious moment of the week: When the doctor used the heartbeat monitor on my belly and the baby kicked it as hard as she could, it even went up in the air! 

Stretch Marks: Nope.

What we've been up to: We are almost done with the nursery! I am just IN LOVE with it and can't wait to do the nursery reveal post!! 

Cravings:  Chocolate milk.  
Total Weight Gain: taking into consideration the gaining and losing, the doctor totaled up 26 lbs for me this week! That is a HUGE deal for me because I gained almost double that with my first child. This walking 2 miles 4 times a week has really paid off this time. 
Sleep: Thankfully I am still sleeping pretty good! I have acid reflux pretty bad some nights, but not enough that a little gum and propping up won't cure. The doctor said I should be hitting my "miserable stage" by now, but I still feel pretty good. I'm just crossing my fingers, waiting. 
Belly Button In or Out: It's still in ... but barely. 
Looking forward to: I think the thing I am most looking forward to is watching my son's reaction when he sees his baby sister for the first time. That thought and excitement is definitely keeping me distracted from the thoughts of labor pains and the anxiety of having two little people we will now be responsible for.

Things have been going so great with this pregnancy. The time has just completely flown by and I can't believe that in about 8 weeks (give or take) I will be holding this sweet baby girl in my arms. She will be the perfect addition to our little family. I can't help but wonder if she will be quiet and calm or loud and rambunctious like our son. If she will have dark hair and skin like me or if we will have another blonde hair blue eyed cutie. I so can't wait to meet her. I already love her so much. 

Bump Update: 24 Weeks

How far along:  24 weeks

Gender:  A baby girl named Annelise. 

Precious moment of the week: One morning our 2 &1/2 year old son came and got in bed with us and we all laid there squeezed together. I could feel baby girl moving and was snuggled up against my precious boy and sweet husband. Life doesn't get much better than moments like that. 

Stretch Marks: Not yet.

What we've been up to: We have officially started on the nursery and I'm loving it! We are doing it in the colors Mint, Coral, and Gold. Below are some fun things I have purchased or plan on purchasing in the near future. 

Cravings:  Peanut butter and Coke Floats. Oh here we go. 

Gulliver White Krib // IKEA

Tissue Paper Garland // GlamFeteByBri

Gold and White Pillow // Caitlin Wilson

Gold Dot Blanket // Sugarplum Lane Boutique

Abstract Splatter Painting // Land of Nod

Hush Little Baby Print // Kindertype

Be Brave Print // Farmhouse Printables

Baby Giraffe Print // The Animal Print Shop

Mint Herringbone Fitted Crib Sheet // ModFox

Roam Print // Jump Off The Page

Mint & Coral Arrow Print // Melinda Wood Designs

Gender Reveal :: So We're Having A ....

Little Girl! We are so excited to have one of each. We technically found out at 14 weeks (I'm 21 now) because a friend of mine gave us a free ultrasound. She did again at 16 weeks just to check again and make sure and YEP! Still a girl. So when I had my "official" ultrasound at 20 weeks, I wasn't surprised at all when I heard those 3 words. It's a Girl.

We've decided on a name for her - Annelise. We think it is so beautiful and unique. In Hebrew it means "gracious and devoted to God." We've already started calling her baby Annelise so that my son will get used to hearing it and we've begun praying for her by name. Now I just need to figure out how to do hair (I can't even do my own! ha!) and we should be just fine. 

Honestly, either way I would have been beyond excited. Little boy or little girl. It is always fun to get a glimpse into the future and see what God wanted you to be the mother of.

How far along:  21 weeks

Gender:  She's a SHE. :) 

Weight Gain: How about we quit logging this, eh? 

Any surprises? The fibroid tumor that my doctor found in the beginning seems to have disappeared.. ??? Either it was our prayers that were answered or maybe she saw something else to begin with and thought it was a tumor. Either way, HOORAY!  

Stretch marks:  Not yet!  .... fingers....crossed.....

Sleep:  Sleeping great! And our little boy is doing great in his big boy bed so that is helping us so much. I'm so proud of him.

Project Nursery: Ready to get started! Here is my pinterest board filled with ideas! - BABY A

Funny moment of the week:  We have a practice baby that my son has been "getting used to" around the house and now he brings it over to me and puts it under my shirt. He doesn't quite get it yet. Silly kid. 

Cravings:  Raspberries and chips & salsa. Not together though, ew. 

Bump Update: 18 Weeks

How far along:  18 weeks

Gender:  We know ... and we have a name picked out! YAY! Now we just need to decide on a middle name. Announcement coming soon. :)

Funny moment of the week: Connor has started feeling the baby, and he get's really excited. But now he is starting to feel the "baby" higher up on my body when we are in the grocery store, etc. It's sooo embarrassing!!

Any surprises?: I'm starting to feel the baby move! It's the best feeling in the world.

Stretch Marks: It's still looking promising.

What we've been up to: Starting to plan the nursery and a little shopping. This weekend we are changing our son's crib into a toddler bed, so I'm thinking we might not be sleeping so well for a couple of months! Here's to saying "get back in bed!" 

Cravings:  Slushies and smoothies. Anything cold! 

Over all, I'm LOVING being pregnant again. It is such an amazing spiritual experience. I can't believe that I am already almost half way through. I've been feeling great and even though I have this fibroid tumor growing in my uterus along with the baby, I don't feel like my middle is as large as it could be. Exercise and eating healthy (most of the time ... let's get real - sometimes I just need a big bowl of queso.) has really paid off this pregnancy. I'm so looking forward to meeting our little one and expanding our family. 

Little Man or Little Miss?

Today we found out the gender of our little sweet pea! It's always so fun and exciting to get a little glimpse into the future and see what God intended on you being the mother of (so far). We aren't ready to make the big announcement quite yet, but above is a fun wives' tales quiz that is suppose to give the mother to be an idea of what she is having! :) These never work for me, they are always usually neck and neck which this time it seems to be as well. 

Stay tuned for the reveal post soon!

How far along:  16 weeks

Gender:  We know ... but Shhh! It's a secret. 

Weight Gain: 11 lbs. So BlueBell came out with a Southern Blackberry Cobbler ice cream. What do you want from me??

Any surprises? Melasma. Not my favorite pregnancy "side effect" in the world, but I guess it could be worse! I've got these brown spots coming up on my cheeks and forehead known as Melasma. Apparently, they are due to the rush of hormones when you are pregnant and will fade soon after having the baby. 

Stretch marks:  Not yet .. but the baby is supposed to double in size in the next 4 weeks so ...

Sleep:  Pretty good. I'd say it's about time to get a body pillow though. 

Project Nursery: Starting to get my ideas together!! I will let you see them soon after the reveal. So excited!!  

Funny moment of the week:  My son does this new dance where he bends over a little to the side and spanks himself. I didn't teach it to him ..... daddy?

Cravings:  Zestie French Fries for breakfast. :)

Bridging the Gap

In light of my week, I wanted to share something that I came across today that gave me so much
encouragement as a mother, and I'm hoping that it might encourage other moms as well. 

First, let's backtrack. 

How did my week start?  

Well, I woke up one morning to the sounds of my child. It wasn't really a cry....more of like a frustrated moan. So I got out of bed to see what was going on. When I walked into his room, I saw him standing there, arms raised, ready to get out of his bed. He looked ok. He wasn't hurt and he started to smile at me as I came in closer. So I thought -ok, he's fine, probably just wanted to wake me up so we could get our day started, no big deal.

As I got in closer and wrapped my hands around him to pick him up, I noticed something odd. I could see more flesh color below his shirt than I normally see. I slowly raised it. That's when I noticed the diaper sitting over in the right side of his bed. You know, the one he took off of his body.  

The first thing that ran through my mind were the words DON'T PANIC. But of course, the next few things to run through it were - how long has this been off? did he pee anywhere? I'm washing all these sheets just in case. why did he take this off ? am I stepping in anything? check the floor, check the floor!!

And that's when I turned around and saw it. Yep... IT. He had gotten tired of it being in his diaper I guess, taken his diaper off, and thrown IT on the floor. You know that music that plays in a horror movie right when the main star sees something terrifying? That music played in my head. Yep. This really just happened to me. I'd be lying if I said I didn't take a deep breath, cringe, and slowly look up at the ceiling ... just in case. 

And if that's not enough to throw off your week, there's more. 

Like the meltdown we had after .. of all things ... taking his toothbrush away. I thought kids didn't even like to brush their teeth! My child can't get enough. He wants to walk around with his toothbrush. He wants to talk to his toothbrush. I'm excited that he loves doing it so much at such a young age, but I'm not too excited about the tantrum he throws when I decide it's time to put it away. Kicking. Screaming. Crying. Hyperventilating. The works.

Then I find out that my son is a hoarder. Yep. You read that right. I pull out the couch to mop underneath and I find a plethora of items he has hidden under there. They include: 6 blocks, 1 sock, 4 goldfish, 2 empty water bottles, 3 assorted balls, 1 I Love Lucy DVD (out of the case), a comb, 2 foam letters, 3 books, and a zebra. You'd think we have a huge couch. But no, it's the usual size. You'd think I haven't mopped in a year. But nope, hasn't been that long ago. How my kid gets everything under there, I'm not really sure. 

After that day, I needed to return a pair of shoes that I bought for a wedding that I ended up not needing. Unfortunately for me, the stroller was in my husband's car. It will be fine, I thought, I will just get one of those kid cars at the front of the mall, take care of what I need to and we'll be headed out.

So there I go, into the mall carrying my 30 lb child, a box of shoes, and my huge diaper bag. Only to find out that I went in on the complete opposite side of the kid cars. So I make my way over there, now sweating profusely and out of breath to see that it costs 5 dollars to rent one of those things. Are they crazy!?! But there was no way I could get this done with a child in my arms, or running around on his own. No way. So I get out my wallet. Nope. No cash. Of course not. I make my way back over to the side of the mall with the ATM machine and withdrawal some money. By this time, my child wants anything but to be in my arms and is squirming like crazy while I'm fumbling these other items in my hands. Did I mention I'm sweating? From this point, my experience was bound to be awful, so I picked my lowest option of withdrawal, $20, and headed to a few of the kiosks to see who had change. After about 10 minutes of that headache, I made it over to the cookie cake place and bought an Icee so that I could get a five dollar bill. It was a small victory to pop that five dollars in that machine and get my car. At first, I couldn't believe those things were $5. By that time, I would have paid a fortune for one. 

And that leads us to Sunday. The day that challenges me at motherhood beyond anything else I have experienced. You see, I tell all of these funny stories about my child throwing fits and well, throwing other gross things, for entertainment purposes on my blog .... but that's only about 5% of the time. The other 95%, he's the happiest, sweetest, most friendly, lovable, adorable kid I've ever known. He's strong, he's kind, he's amazing. It's just that he's still a baby, and he's a BOY and he's not around other children a lot. So when we go to church services, he thinks it's time to play. Yesterday morning, I thought we were READY. I mean, you would think that about 3 books with 100 pages each, some crayons, a bucket of goldfish (ok, so maybe not a bucket .... that's an exaggeration. More like a barrel),  a bag full of toys, and half of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich would be enough to keep your child still and quiet for a few minutes right? Well, once again I spent Sunday in the nursery *surprise* talking my son out of running into walls, reaching in the trash can, and getting in the faces of the other children just to say "hi!". It felt like a disaster. It's always the day when I need the most encouragement, and the day I'm hardest on myself as a mom. 

That brings me back to what I saw that encouraged me. It's exactly what I needed. I found it on a website called In the Mom Light that I stumbled upon when looking for something else. I'm so glad I did. 

I'm looking forward to seeing what adventures next week holds! 

Revealed.

I remember what Sunday mornings used to be like. Before I spent them in the nursery, wrestling what feels like a twenty pound bag of snakes. Sweating. Rolling my eyes at myself because I just had to wear this dress and it sure doesn't make it easy for me to move nor is it comfortable in the least bit. Before I had my hair pulled constantly and my bracelets ripped off, fighting a sleepy child.

Before these days, I sat comfortably in my pew. Bible in my lap, maybe a notepad out to take some notes. My husband's arm around me, listening attentively with absolute peace of mind.

I look in front of us now, on most Sunday mornings, before I leave to head to the nursery to listen to the sermon in there - because my child won't stop squealing or babbling or crying or screaming or just trying to flirt with the pretty girls that sit behind us, distracting everyone in plain view. I juggle the books, toys, snacks, and anything and everything else within arms reach I can use to distract him, but nothing works. I see the young couples in the rows, pointing out things to each other in their Bibles, cuddled close together with the husband's arm around the wife, calmness on their faces. That used to be us, I tell myself, as I stand up with my son in my arms, look down at our train wreck of a pew, the lonesome gap between my husband and I, grab my bag and let out a big huff of breath to display my discouragement. 

It is one of those inevitable moments where I feel like I wasn't cut out for this mother stuff.

And then, once we get into the nursery, something in that moment is revealed to me.

I finally get him calmed down, tuck his little arm under mine, and begin to rock him slowly. The room is quiet and still. We stare at the mint green wall with the beautifully painted tree. And I see his head lift up to look me in the eyes. Over the speaker the preacher talks of being aware of our treasures. And at that moment, I am. He snuggles up closer to me, and I can feel his head relax on my bicep, eyelids having trouble staying opened. The way the light hits his skin makes it shimmer, almost like there is gold in it. He falls asleep with a little bit of a smile on his face. I wanted to be in there, with them.... but he, he is right where he wanted to be. And it is revealed to me, that as exhausting as motherhood is sometimes, and as much as it has changed the routine I've been so comfortable with, I can't imagine being like those couples in the pew again. I can't imagine not looking over at my husband and chuckling when a big burp comes out of such a little body. I can't imagine little arms not flailing in front of me as we sing our hymns. I can't imagine not seeing a little finger tracing the shapes in the books we pull out with hesitation.

And I can't, as much as I could try, imagine a Sunday morning ... with empty arms.

Being a mother has revealed to me that as much as I loved the honeymoon phase, this chapter of our lives is far better and I could never imagine life again, without my little shadow.

He's a little wobbly now. I watch his chubby thighs squat as he figures out a way to get down from the object he just pulled up on. Just three weeks ago he was learning to crawl. Today, he is standing while holding on to things and taking steps to get closer. He changed so quickly from the quiet little baby that we carried around to the child that illuminates every room we bring him into. 

If someone could tell me how to stop this clock, and just be allowed to sit here, in this day I've spent with my son until I feel I've soaked up enough of it, I'd give anything. If I could stop the sun from setting, just for one day, just for a little while, until I felt enough sugars on my lips, saw enough smiles, and heard enough laughter to have it memorized in my soul, I can assure you, I would. But that's not what a sun is for. It's for counting our days. For reminding us that we have only a short amount of time to fill them with as much significance and joy as we can.

I often find myself staring at him when he doesn't know I'm watching, just playing with his toys and jabbering to himself. He always focuses so intently on everything he wants to play with. Sometimes I wonder if he'll one day be an architect. No matter what type of fun or colorful toy he touches, he is always inquisitive about how it is assembled. Such a promising little mind that I am helping shape and mold. And as I watch him, I feel an overwhelming sense of  happiness to know that he is a part of me. But with the happiness always comes a little bit of sadness when I remember that I will only be given one of these moments, just like this.

And I can never get it back.   

Being a mother has revealed to me that life flies by entirely too fast and as much as I ache to, I can't slow down a single day, or a single moment, of this beautiful journey.

Last week, I traveled back to where I grew up for a day in order to help my mom get some of my grandmother's things in order. I sat there with her, looking through old photo albums, watching her face light up when she saw one of my brother and me years ago. They were faded, partly because of the quality of cameras back then, but mostly because they had been in the book, behind the cover, for almost 30 years. But what isn't faded, are my memories of my childhood with my mother.

Two things I would never be able to separate in my mind are music and my childhood. I can still see her, in her lightly washed flare leg bluejeans with big vertical pockets, dancing to Gary Morris songs on our living room floor. She always encouraged us to dance with her, and so we would get up from whatever had our attention at the time, grab her hands and start moving. I have no doubt in my mind that it brought my mother so much joy to share those moments with us. If I had only known then that she was probably wishing to freeze that moment, I would have made it last so much longer. For her. I wouldn't have raced back to my barbies or my play "school". I would have held her hands and danced with her there until she let go. I would have stretched it out as long as I could. For her.

 For me.

I had no idea how much my mother loved me. It wasn't hard to guess. She has always been nothing but selfless for me and my brother. She has always given anything and everything to ensure our safety and happiness. I was pretty sure I could imagine just how much she probably loved me as I got older, but I could never really understand until I had my son. And now I know.

She had it much harder than I do. She didn't have the Internet to google questions about baby foods or sleep patterns. She didn't have Pinterest to show her how to make homemade wipes or a Halloween costume. She learned as she went along and she did such an amazing job. I see a lot of her in myself. I say words to my son that I haven't heard in years, words that she used to say to us. I catch myself using the same looks and turning on the same music for us to dance to in the morning.

I couldn't make time stop for my mother. And I sure can't make it stop for me.

But if my children grow up, and look back on their childhood with affection and tenderness, and think that I have done even half the job with them that my mother did with us, I will be satisfied.

  

Being a mother has revealed to me what a wonderful mom I am blessed to have.

 

  Motherhood is so much harder than I ever imagined it would be. It is long sleepless nights and half eaten dinners. It is chasing around a speedy crawler and full hands and fumbling keys on the way to the car. It's even Sunday mornings in the nursery. And I'm only ten months in.

But I wouldn't trade a second of it, not for anything in the world. It reveals something new to me every day. Something about who I am, who God is, and what a blessing I've been given in my son. All I can do when I'm having one of those days where I'm feeling as though maybe I'm not cut out for this mother stuff, is to be aware of my treasures. Be conscious that this is the best we get in life. These are some of my happiest days. Even worn out, when I lay my head on the pillow at night and think back on all I've done with my son that day and all that has made me laugh and smile, it was worth it. And I can't slow the days down, not a bit. But I can make sure I use them up. And show him how much I love him every opportunity I get. Just like my mother did for me.

Let's Play Catch Up ...

My husband brought it to my attention the other night that I haven't been a very faithful blogger since I had our son. And he's right. When I was expecting, I made it a point to blog every two weeks about what was going on, feelings I experienced, and funny things that were happening. I also included a picture.

So now, why not continue updating all of you on how my sweet boy is learning and growing and show you pictures of how adorable he is?! I often forget that posting pictures on Facebook of him doesn't do any of my blog followers that aren't on facebook any good. So this post will be for catch up purposes only.

First, let me just say ... being a mother is the greatest thing in the world. I really wish I could better articulate the magnitude of becoming a mother for young women who have yet to experience this. Everyone thinks they know just how amazing it is going to be, and then they are completely... well, pleasantly surprised, I think. At least, I know I was. From the moment that I knew I was carrying a growing person inside of me, it was the most beautiful, extraordinary experience I could have ever imagined. And for those who are still kind of soul searching, have yet to feel their worth or are trying to find value in themselves through other things, I wish they could know what is coming. Because I've been the career woman, putting all of my focus and energy into that, and I've been the person who finds inspiration and passion in art and music and literature, I totally get all of that, I do. But becoming a mother is the single greatest role that I could ever take on in my lifetime.

The first part of this post might be a little boring to those of you who could not care less about the hair and weight of a growing baby. So feel free to skip on down...  

 The first month of Connor's life was such a joy. We were slowly getting to know each other. His personality really hadn't shown itself yet, but he was getting used to our home and his new family. He was so very tiny. Looking back now, it is hard to believe that he was ever under 8 lbs. Within the first month of his life, he began smiling. I fell in love with that smile immediately and only love it more every day that I see it.

The nights where I was able to rock Connor to sleep were some of the most precious. And skin to skin time is just so sweet and special, I am so glad that we took the time to do that bonding with him. He loved it, and Adam and I loved it as well.

Month two was very busy for all of us. We had Christmas and New Years' travels all within a couple of weeks and it totally threw Connor off of his routine. It was great seeing family though and getting to see everyone in mine and Adam's family interacting with him. He is so loved. A little more of his personality started to shine through at the end of 2 months, and we began really getting to play with him with little toys. But mostly, he was like any other baby. Eat, poop, sleep. :)

During month 2 I started realizing that morning was definitely Connor's favorite time of the day. He always woke up in such a sweet mood and always gave me this biggest smile when I walked into his room. Lucky for us, around the 2nd month, he started sleeping through the night. I mean .. ALL THE WAY THROUGH. Some nights he would get 8-10 hours of sleep. Which was really good for Momma. Unfortunately, he didn't do it for long, like everyone warned me of. Now, he is waking up, but only once a night on our best nights. 

Month 3 was full of milestones. He was smiling more, (and we discovered an adorable dimple) and he even rolled over once. (Which turned out to be a total fluke, because he didn't do it again for another 2 months.) He did start a little babbling though and "laughing" which was more of a squeal at the time. Real laughing comes later. This was the time when I really started to notice that his hair was growing at a rapid pace and he was probably not going to lose it, like most babies do. He also started getting incredibly chunky.

During month 3, Connor started reaching and putting both hands on the sides of our faces. Sometimes he would pull me in close and give me sugars, and sometimes he would just study my face. It was the sweetest.

Month 4 we started experimenting with solid foods like cereal and applesauce. It was a busy month, filled with seeing family, going to a friends' wedding, and St. Pattys Day. Connor could finally stand on his own and hold his weight. His laugh turned into more of a giggle and his smile was contagious. Everywhere we went, people would tell me what a beautiful baby he was and how sweet his smile was. By the end of month 4 he was in the 90th percentile for babies his age with weight and height. He weighed 16 lbs and was 25 inches long.

At the end of month four, he really started discovering his mouth. And that turned out to mean a bunch of spit baths for me and Adam. He likes to blow bubbles and he thinks he is so funny when he gets it all in your face. He also started to get really ticklish during this month.

Every month has just been sweeter and sweeter than the last. Month 5 was really when I felt like his little personality completely formed and let me just say, he is going to be one funny kid! He loves to make us laugh and will do anything to do it. He is also such a cute little faker! He fake coughs, and does this funny thing where he opens his mouth and makes it look like he is cracking up, but nothing comes out. He also started getting to where he would push his toys off of the high chair tray when I wasn't looking. Sometimes I would turn around toward him and he had the funniest look on his face and his toy elephant would be right up to the edge before he would give it a little shove and a smile. That little stinker.

This was also the month when he started rolling everywhere and actually putting his arms around my neck when I carry him. Which, is my favorite! It is so precious to feel that hug. During this month his hair started getting extremely long and curly and more and more people started asking me how old "SHE" was. Ha! That doesn't bother me too much, because I know it just means that he has a  beautiful face. By the end of month 5 Connor was weighing a good 18-19 lbs.

We are now in the middle of month 6. And as you can see from the picture, Connor has started thinning out a little more and is still as tall as ever! I have a feeling he is going to be tall like his daddy and uncle Taylor. He has started shaking his rattle and he loves playing the little piano that belonged to me when I was a child. Last night, for the first time, he actually pulled his legs up and got on his hands and knees when laying on his stomach so crawling seems to be right around the corner!!

I love so many things about him. He is "talking" so much and I know I have heard him say Momma once or twice, but I don't count it since I can never get him to say it twice in a row. When we go for a ride in his stroller, he puts his arm up on the side and leans back just like he is "cruising". He is so funny. He has gotten to where he will wave back at you if you wave at him and his hair just keeps getting crazier and crazier so I see a trim in our near future. (I think I might cry!)

I love this phase of his life and I feel so incredibly blessed to be able to be at home with him every day to experience all of these firsts. I wouldn't trade this time for anything in the world.

Just a couple of weeks ago, we decided to move closer to Adam's job so that we could save a little gas money. So we found ourselves a cute little house that we now call home. I absolutely love it and I know that we are going to have some wonderful memories here.

Here are a few pictures:

{our backyard at sunset}

{the front porch}

{the kitchen is huge!} 

{can you spot my "pinterest" ideas??} :)

{Connor's room , not yet finished}

{Our little family}

Becoming a mother has completely changed my life. It's amazing how your priorities and views of the world change when you have a child. And you just come to terms with the fact that you are probably always going to be leaving the house with a little spit up on your shoulder, a little applesauce in your hair, and there will always be that moment on a date night when you pull in to your destination, start to brainstorm if you are going to get the baby out of the car seat or just take it all inside, and then tear up a little when you turn around and realize he isn't even with you. I know that these days are some of the most special days of my life and I try so hard to remember those precious moments as they happen.

... But our memory is a strange thing.

It stores the moments, pieces of ourselves ... of our story, that we never want to lose. And isn't it weird how we can't seem to remember important days in our lives, as much as we would like to, - for example- the day I graduated from College, but I can hear a song and remember the exact place that I was standing or sitting and the exact feeling I had in the pit of my stomach the first time I ever heard it?

It's strange.

I've come to the realization that one of my greatest fears is forgetting.

It terrifies me.

I don't want to forget voices of people I love, or important words spoken to me, but most of all, I don't want to forget the feelings I had during different stages of my life. Especially this one. I think that is why I take so many pictures of our life. Because I am not trying to capture what it looks like, I'm trying to capture what it feels like.

Recently, I have caught myself taking it all in ... on purpose. Like when I am holding Connor, and he does that thing where he reaches up and puts both hands on either side of my face. Comes in close until our faces are touching.

I intentionally stop that moment.
I breathe slower. I make my eyes memorize everything. His eyelashes. The color of his skin. I lift my head up and put my nose on his hair to breathe in the smell of his shampoo. And I say to myself ...

Don't forget this moment. Whatever you do. Please, don't forget this moment.

It's going to be gone in the blink of an eye. Some day before I can even begin to truly realize the blessing I have, he will be too big to hold. His hands won't fit on my cheeks the way they do now.

And I just can't let myself forget what this feels like.